I am writing this article while seeing a show on Big CBS channel called “THE TALK”. It is somewhat similar to Oprah Winfrey show where the anchors of the show pick up one topic and pour their hearts out on theirs and others views on the matter. Today the topic was “bullying” – I was literally so overwhelmed hearing true stories involving 11-year olds and 14- year olds being victimized by bullies in the junior school. I was particularly moved by story where kid committed suicide because he could not face the people bullying him anymore.
Bullying is when someone keeps doing or saying things to have power over another person. Some of the ways people bully others people are by: calling them names, saying or writing nasty things about them, leaving them out of activities, not talking to them, threatening them, making them feel uncomfortable or scared, taking or damaging their things, hitting or kicking them, or making them do things they don’t want to do.
There are many types of bullying which include: school bullying, workplace bullying, cyber- bullying etc. “The Talk” show had interviewed a girl who was victim to cyber bullying which goes easily undetected since it lacks adult supervision but this girl choose to discuss the issue with her mom – she stood up for herself – which I guess will be a source of inspiration for others to do the same.
One thing I could not understand was– WHY? WHY DO PEOPLE BULLY OTHERS?. My question was answered just then as the anchor interviewed a 21 year old guy who admitted to bully many people in his high school years. He admitted that he saw it as a way of being popular, or making themselves look tough and in charge. Some bullies do it to get attention or things, or to make other people afraid of them. He also admitted that he would be embarrassed if the people he bullied just stood up for themselves and answered back !
The effect of bullying a person takes a toll on the victim’s emotional well being. We should not underestimate the fear that builds up inside the victim. It leads to loss of confidence and hurts the self- esteem of the victim. The victim also feels helpless and weak because no one can protect them. A similar such story was told where the kid committed suicide because he was bullied in his school.
A lot of times the child who is bullied feels they did something to bring this one. In such situations we need to re-assure them that they are not alone and this was certainly not brought on by them. Some young people are bullied for no particular reason, but sometimes it’s because they are different in some way – perhaps it’s the colour of their skin, the way they talk, their size or their name.
We all need to realise that we are all individuals and each one of us are different. Please learn to accept who you are and love yourself just the way you are. Stand up for yourselves because sometimes young people are bullied because they look like they won’t stand up for themselves.
Always make friends wherever you go and please realize you don’t have to face this on your own. COMMUNICATE ! COMMUNICATE AND PLEASE COMMUNICATE… talk it out with someone your comfortable with because that is the first step for gaining support, love and care to face such situation and understand “WHY” this is happening. Bottling up emotions will just make things worse.
As for the ones who witness such bullying ..if you are unaware as to what to do next – please ensure you tell someone. If you have enough courage – please stand up for the victim. Advise the victim to talk to their parents or teachers.