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“No doubt exists that all women are crazy; it’s only a question of degree” – W. C Fields
It goes without saying that we women are capable of doing almost anything in the name of looking good. I can almost feel some of you smiling to yourselves as you’re reading this as you, just as I have fallen prey to some pretty crazy things to look good; with or without weighing the logic behind them. Looking good and attractive has become a survival instinct as every woman seeks to increase their beauty quotient. It’s a rat race out there and when competition is tough, we will look high and low to ensure our looks are not compromised one bit, even if it calls for a bit of wackiness. That’s the thing about us women; we can’t camouflage our loony side can we! But even if they guarantee good results we mustn’t lose our sanity in the pressure of looking good.
Don’t be embarrassed as we all have done something or the other bizarre and that’s what makes us the unique women we are. Thus, separating us from the oh-so practical men who probably scorn at us when they see us in our crazy avatar. But, such idiosyncrasies are engraved in our grey matter whether the opposite sex likes it or not! Even if your mothers scowl at you saying “what in God’s name are you doing…?”, you can rest assured she’s possibly done some wild stuff too back in the day and most probably knows where her daughters coming from. She possibly wants to ensure you’re not going to face any adverse consequences.
However, when donning your irrational streak, please, please ensure you don’t go overboard and harm yourself. As I’ve heard quite a lot of stories of the extent some women go to and I’m glad I’m not one of them. I’m not being judgmental here ladies, but going too farfetched and becoming obsessive about your looks is not something I would advise. Look at Kim Kardashian and Kylie Jenner… will they ever stop experimenting with their face and bodies!
Wouldn’t it be fun next time you catch up with your girlfriends and exchange all the crazy things you’ve done in the past to look good? If you ask me well… ahem ahem… will spill the beans later on, but I must admit that I haven’t done anything too extreme or painful. Here are the top 10 ridiculous and most crazy things women do to look good that I’ve selected for you… ouch!
1. Uncomfortable shoes
Most of us love wearing high heels as they elongate the legs and add that oomph, which flats can’t do. I have some 4-5 inch heels, which I save only for special occasions where walking around is limited as I know the pain that follows. However, whilst all that is said and done, some women will go to the extent of wearing extremely high heels for extended lengths of time (all day even) and despite the pinch they cause after a while, they still insist on keeping them on as they cannot be seen without.
Whether you’re short or tall, high heels need to be worn in moderation and when I’m out and about in heels I like to take them off and relax my feet whenever I can like, when I’m sitting at my desk at work etc. But, when women wear heels all day long it’s almost like strutting around in your tip toes with just a spike to balance your heel, very harmful for the feet bones and torturous too. Many women have developed feet and bone disorders due to this. I’ve also seen women (in my known circle) to wear super tight and extra high heels to look glamorous (or maybe they didn’t get their size) and taller yet they are willing to pay the price of limping around or having blisters etc.
Another common thing women do is wear smaller shoes or ones that are narrower than their feet just because they look good. Especially if you have wide feet, it can be harmful to your bones and end up crushing them and causing unsightly bunions that a lot of women have due to poor feet structure. Victoria Beckham is one celebrity who I always see in high heels and has bunions, yet she doesn’t seem to learn.
Have you heard of foot binding? It is the ancient Chinese custom of wrapping the feet of young girls in extra tight binding to prevent the feet from growing, as small feet was considered a strong beauty attribute. This however led to lifelong disabilities; torturous if you ask me!
2. Animals and Humans entrails
Again another Japanese inspired beauty fad is drinking collagen that is obtained from cows, poultry and pigs (feet). They either consume it in a powder form or in a drink form. By drinking concentrated animal collagen women are able to reverse the signs of aging. They also add this animal generated collagen to their coffees and yoghurt.
Human and animal placenta is said to be used to apply on the face to eradicate toxins, improve elasticity and increase the glow of the skin. Certain dermatologists who promote this placenta treatment take discarded placenta straight from the maternity wards and after cleaning it, apply it on their client’s faces. Hmmm not sure this is for the faint hearted especially when they squeal at the very sight of human body parts and entrails.
3. Rib removal
Although rib removal is a surgical procedure to remove one or more ribs for medical purposes, some women across the world have had some of their bottom ribs removed in order to achieve a slimmer waist, via this form of body modification. I’m not just talking about women in the 1800’s, but even today many women seek this procedure in the name of beauty and a perfect hourglass body.
4. Snake venom cream
Gwyneth Paltrow may swear by this cream, but it’s not an ingredient that is most commonly sought after. Apparently snake venom is an active ingredient that helps in plumping up the skin much like botox. Now don’t go chasing snakes girls!
5. Leech therapy
Yes, this literally refers to those blood sucking ugly leeches and the therapy is known as leech therapy, where you allow leeches to feed off your blood to detoxify you. The very suggestion of it makes me quiver, so I know I will never and can never do this no matter what beautification this promises. Leech therapy has been around since many years now and had been used by ancient Egyptian doctors to cure various ailments. Thanks to actress Demi Moore, this therapy became popular when she admitted to undergoing this. One has to bathe in turpentine first and then place advanced high level blood sucking leeches on the body and let them bite into the skin. Whilst they are sucking and extracting the blood from the body, they release an enzyme into your bloodstream, which detoxifies your blood and cleanses your body. This does make you bleed a lot, but people like Demi Moore vouch for such painful treatments in the name of looking good, especially at her age.
6. Fish pedicures
Now this is one that is tried and tested by me. Yes girls sorry to admit it, but I’m guilty as charged. A mall in Delhi had set up a Doctor Fish spa where you basically put your dangling feet inside a tank filled with water and they pour in these small fish called Garra Rufa or also known as Doctor fish or nibble fish. The tiny fish immediately swarm around your feet and bite away at the dead skin. I know, I know it sounds pretty gross, but I only did it as I was intrigued at the concept and wanted to experience this fad. To be honest, other than a good amount of tickling the fish provided while nibbling away at my feet, it didn’t do much. I was too grossed out to stay too long in the tank as I knew the same fish had been biting away at other people’s feet too and that wasn’t a pleasant thought. It is said to be banned now in many countries and I’m glad I’m back to my normal pedicures, which guarantee results and are not so bizarre.
7. Vampire facial
This is by far one of the most outrageous beauty treatments I’ve ever come across and it’s ridiculous what lengths some women will go. I’m not at all surprised that Kim Kardashian underwent this procedure in the hope of younger looking skin. What this entails is pumping out blood from your arm with a large syringe and then piercing the blood in to your face with needles. Kim even made a live video of this to document it and boy what pain she had to go through. Is it worth it? Not sure!
8. Bird poop facials
You might have heard of this one. The Guanine enzyme, found in bird droppings is said to cleanse, exfoliate and brighten up the facial skin when applied. Not just any old bird, but the Nightingale droppings are said to be the most effective. Although, it sounds gross as even a drop of bird poop on our car windows freaks us out; so forget our faces. But, these faeces are apparently sterilized before applying onto the skin. Such facials are quite the craze in Hollywood as some celebrities swear by smearing their face with bird poop and a single facial can cost up to $200. The Japanese also advocate this beauty treatment and owe their porcelain skin to this. Posh Spice loves this facial btw!
9. Urine treatment
I’ve heard of how urine can cure wounds and certain ailments as it is said to contain nutrients and antibodies. Remember that episode of the Friends sitcom where Monica got stung by a jellyfish and Chandler had to urinate on her leg to free her of the pain… lol! Well there are some women who strongly believe in urine treatments due to its restorative properties. When applied topically it is believed to clear skin of acne, psoriasis, eczema and even wrinkles.
10. Bee venom mask
Another insane treatment is the use of bee venom to prevent wrinkles and sworn by the likes of Duchess of Cambridge, Kate Middleton and Duchess of Cornwall, Camilla. This is a natural alternative to Botox and is hideously expensive too. This cream that is used as a mask induces a skin reaction that is similar to being stung by a bee. Now that’s painful! The body then increases its blood flow and collagen to repair the area and improving the skin. However, the downside is that those who are allergic to this reaction can go into anaphylactic shock, which can be fatal.
So girls, I’m all for doing things to look good as there’s absolutely nothing wrong in that and as long as they don’t have any harmful side effects and are not outrageously ridiculous, it’s fine by me. But, I have to say some of the above are way beyond my imagination. What ridiculous things have you done and would you do any of the above?
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