By Maya Ramchandani
I am writing after quite a lot of time and so I have this post regarding tips to have a healthy and the most loyal relationship from the start itself. You people know that it is quite difficult to change things later on when you two are involved with each other. So if you find the one who is perfect for you, then aim to have a healthy relation from the starting itself so that he is not shocked by any of the things he gets to know later.
1. Don’t be cheesy at first
If you are dating someone, don’t get too much into him from your starting dates if you are planning to have a shot with him in future. This is quite a common point for all of us but still some women rush into things with a guy and this does not give a great impression. This would leave you in a cheesy category which you are definitely not. And if it is just the start of your dating thing, then spend equally if not more. This is a good etiquette and then a dating tip too. 🙂
2. Mark his words
Whenever a man tells you that he is not looking for future partner or for an honest commitment , even in jokes – take it seriously. Repeat this to yourself and your friends again so that you believe this fact and do not get much into him. Because this is a usual issue these days. Couples are not much into a serious commitment and it’s good that your partner has warned you well before.
3. Show your true colors
Girls, this one is important. I have seen many people who pretend to be totally different at the start and then they show their true colors. This is wrong. If he gets to know more about your true personality later on, he would be totally pissed off and would never feel the same for you again. If you want to be with someone in future then you need to show him what actually you are. Otherwise things won’t last for long.
4. Keep things light
It’s well known that men often rush into a relationship and then get pissed about the fact that it is moving too fast. So to avoid hearing such ridiculous lines from your partner, you need to apply the brakes and takes things slowly and lightly. Keep things light for at least three months and then progress with mutual understanding.
5. Social acceptance
Remember girls, he is not completely your partner or boyfriend unless he publically or socially accepts this. Not that he should change his relationship status on Facebook but there are times when he should accept in front of his friends about you and him. And if is he not doing this even after 3 to 6 months, then trust me, he is a coward and he would never commit to you in future.
6. Emotional talks
Whenever you want to talk to him on a serious relationship matter try to do this when he is involved in some low key activity like walking or sitting on the couch. Never do these talks on phone calls or messages. This is a scientific fact that low key activities lower the stress hormone level of a man and then he can express better without panicking.
If you find that he is overwhelmed during an argument, do take a 20 minute break and relax because a man’s body gets easily flooded with stress hormones. And also if you have any problem with his friends or his parties etc, do talk about it and let him know otherwise you would eventually explode. Deliver an ultimatum about commitment only if you are ready to walk out. Be firm about your expectations.
7. Seek for a good company
Well, it’s not always important that you two need to spend time all alone. Look for some happy couples. This is again a psychological fact that if your relationship grows among happy couples or long time couples then your relationship would last longer than expected. 😛 Secondly, do remember that nobody can cut ties with their past so once things are all soughted and clear to you, do not fight on that same topic again. Find some new and interesting topics, girls. LOL. JK.
8. Appreciation is a must
Just like we tell them about their mistakes and they listen, in the same way it is important to appreciate and encourage him for the things he does right or in the way you like. So ultimately he would appreciate your vision as well. Get into the habit of combining a complaint with a compliment.
9. Watch your mouth
Even if you are arguing on an important topic and you are totally right on your part, still do keep a watch on your mouth because many a times we girls lose temper very fast and speak all that we should not. Remember girls, cruel words are often forgiven but never forgotten. Give respect, take respect is the best motto.
10. Indulge in fun things
If you desire to have a happy relationship from the start, indulge into some dance classes, piano classes or any outdoor activity together. Play competitive games together to have a great spark and continuity and also this would strengthen your bond.
11. Don’t point out your flaws on your own
Yesterday I went to the mall for shopping and I noticed a cute couple there. The girl came out of the trial room and asked her guy whether she has gained a little weight or not. 😛 So this is a funny and useful tip – girls, if your body has changed in some way, gained or lost weight do not ask or point out yourself. Because men usually do not notice such little changes, then why ruin your own image.
12. Space is important
Whether it is your start or it has been quite long for you two being together, remember that space is equally important for you as it is for him. Don’t dump everyone and your friends just to be with him 24/7. Space is healthy and do this from the start itself so he does not find it awkward when you ditch him to attend your best friend’s party.
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