The jealous are troublesome to others, but a torment to themselves. ~William Penn, Some Fruits of Solitude, 1693
What do you feel when you see
• Someone looking better than you in a party
• Neighbours new car
• Somebody’s success
• Someone getting more attention than you are
JEALOUSY is the word. Isn’t it? Well, it is a human tendency to envy others success. Though, the degree of discomfort varies from person to person. Jealousy can sneak in when you least expect it.
Envy and jealousy are two different emotions. Envy is when you desire to do as well as the other person. Whereas, jealousy is when you want to be the only person who is doing well.
We experience jealousy because of lack of some quality, skill or trait that we do not possess. I myself felt a pang of this recently, when someone I knew got praised for my efforts and hard work.
Tips to overcome jealousy:
Following are some methods that may help you to reduce this negative thought pattern:
• Stop comparing: Comparing yourself with others is the sure shot way to make yourself miserable. By doing so you direct your energies in noticing what others have, rather than seeing and appreciating your uniqueness. It is always better to compare yourself to yourself. Be pleased about what you have achieved and what you plan to achieve.
• Find what is bullying you? Jealousy generally stems from some form of fear. Try to find the cause of your jealousy. What is it that you are afraid to lose? Write down all your thoughts on paper. This will enable you to get a clear picture. Once you know what is it then lay out a rough plan to deal with it. You can change yourself only if you are aware of your feelings. Jealousy doesn’t go until it is acknowledged.
• Develop an abundance mentality: It tells you that there are always new chances and opportunities. So what if you could not make it this time. There is no scarcity of opportunities in this world. Once you start to see various opportunities for yourself you will feel more relaxed and positive.
• Find your strength: Instead of cribbing about others success find the abilities that you are blessed with. Strengthen them and motivate yourself to get what you want.
“To overcome jealousy, just see how the jealousy came into your system, just analyze the sequence of thoughts and emotions in your system and then undo it by reasoning out the whole process with your intelligence.”– Swamiji Nithyananda
By changing the way we think, we can overcome the way we feel.
When was the last time you face this green-eyed monster?
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