Five Reasons Why Your Hair Isn’t Listening to You

Five Reasons Why Your Hair Isn’t Listening to You

Five Reasons Why Your Hair Isn’t Listening to You

Okay, now if you just read the title and snorted in triumph, I’m guessing you’re one of the few women whose hair actually listens to them. It stays how you want it to, it doesn’t suddenly extend in all directions apart from downward, and it doesn’t do jumping jacks without your permission or with; I mean come on, it’s just hair!

All in all, it’s good and perfect. If you don’t belong to this coveted clan, congratulations!!!!  You’re either one of the majority of women globally who feel so or you are a member of the Aloopa Society. I’ve heard they’ve stopped taking in new members for the past year or so, so it’s most likely the former.

Now, I’m not any sort of expert on the matter nor have I gone to the Beauty School and learnt about hair texture, porosity, etc. However, I do know what generally works and what doesn’t, through experience. Make that experiments.
Do you feel like this most of the time?

Then read on,

Reason #1: You starve it.

Hair Protein Mask

Simply put, if you starve your hair, it will just refuse to listen to you. Try sitting in an empty room with a hungry and cranky toddler, and you’ll see what I mean.  Feed your hair whatever it needs. If it needs conditioner, feed it some. If it requires a protein snack, smother it in a protein-rich hair mask.

Reason #2: You listen to the bottle.


If you listen to the bottle, your hair won’t listen to you. Probably, think of it this way – your hair isn’t on talking terms with that gorgeous bottle of shampoo with pictures of fruit on it that you have sitting in your shower stall. So, what if the bottle tells you to use a palmful of shampoo, lather up, rinse and repeat? Just don’t listen. More often than not, our hair doesn’t need the second shampooing. The second time just serves to dry out hair and dried out hair isn’t exactly the most fun thing in the world now, is it?

Your conditioner bottle tells you to use a ‘dime-sized amount’. Really?! Those directions are for wimps. Pour out a good amount of conditioner and let your hair saturate in it, and leave it on for at least 3 minutes. Is your hair listening to you yet?

Reason #3: You listen to others.

Overshampooing of hair

No one’s telling you to NOT listen to others. However, it doesn’t mean you’ve got to be a zombie with no mind of your own. You know those people who tell you stuff like “Don’t wash your hair every day, or it’ll shrivel up and fall out of your head”? Yeah, they’re either members of the We Like Sweat and Gunk Club (WLSG Club) or participants in the Hair Needs to Wallow in Its Own Filth Rally (HNWOF Rally). Either way, it doesn’t bode well for you.

If you feel your head needs a wash daily, go ahead and do just that. In this tropical climate of India, you can’t really afford to wash your hair only every four days or so. You tend to sweat, and all that salt mixed with the dust your hair catches when you go outdoors shouldn’t really be stewing on your head for 3-4 days. Just make sure to use good products, and mild shampoo, and follow up with lots of rich conditioner.

Reason #4: You don’t listen to yourself.

Only you know what’s best for your hair! Millions of people can tell you what to use for it and what to do with it, but the ultimate choice is yours. You’re the one who washes it, brushes it, ties, it, twirls it, and the one whose scalp it grows out of. Do take advice and tips from others (like you’re doing now from me), but do also ponder over whether you think it will work for you. When it comes to your hair, you’re the expert. The Emperor. The Pharaoh.

Reason #5: You torture it.

comb hair

If your hair feels like it’s being tortured, it probably is and you know you need to stop doing so. For one, stop flat-ironing it so much. When you heat your hair to such high temperatures, the water in your hair boils and weakens the area, causing hair to go brittle and break off in those areas.  This also means no pulling and tugging at your hair with a brush. Use a good quality brush if you must, or use a comb and comb means a wide-toothed one, with no seams on it. If you can’t find a seamless wide-toothed comb, you can sandpaper the seams away. However, make sure you don’t leave any jagged bits that can pull at your hair and snag it. Wooden combs are the best. Try to avoid the cheapie plastic ones and never ever use combs with closely set together teeth. They are bad. Repeat after me – They are BAAAAD! They may give the appearance of well-kept and smooth hair, but what they really do is break your hair off in tiny pieces, causing those nasty fly-aways in the front of your head and in order to smooth them out, you use it again, causing even more. It’s a vicious cycle, really.


Those tight ponytails and pulled back hairstyles that look fabulous? What about them, you say? Imagine yourself many, many years down the line, with a very much-receded hairline. Now, do you still want to tie your hair that tight all the time?

So, there you have a few reasons for your hair not listening to you and don’t look at me that way; you know you’re guilty of it too. :haanji:

Yes, I’m not kidding. These little steps can make a world of a difference to your hair.  By the way, I am not all talk and no show. This is a picture of my hair as on November 13, 2011. Sorry about the blackened out part in the background – I didn’t mean for it to get in the picture, actually.


So go ahead, and take small steps toward a gorgeous head of hair. It’s the doing that actually counts!

Till next time, with love,


Image Sources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6.

Hair Care 1: Structure of Hair
Hair Care 4: Tips for Dry Hair
Rose Water for Hair Care
Skin and Hair Care Tips for Monsoons
8 Quick Hair Care Tips
9 Hair Care Tips for Long Hair for Indian Women
Some Quick Hair Care Tips
Hair Care Tips for Strong Healthy Hair
5 Awesome DIY Hair Care Tips
Hibiscus for Hair Care
My Skin Care and Hair Care Routine
Hair Care: The Body Shop New Eco-Conscious Rainforest Hair Care
Split Hair Ends: Home Remedies and Treatment


49 thoughts on “Five Reasons Why Your Hair Isn’t Listening to You

  1. Hello ladies,
    I’m a regular reader of this AWESOME blog.
    Just have something to ask Samantha… I have thick, unruly curls, coming to about the middle of my back. On most days I can get them to behave themselves, but the hair at the crown of my head is really frizzy (understatement of my life). :headbang: :waaa:
    Do you know of any products readily available in India that can help frizzy, curly hair? I really don’t want to chop it off, even though common sense says shorter curls will be easier to manage… :((

    1. Hey CrimsonMoonlight! 🙂
      You know what, it’s not really the products that perform miracles for your hair. I’m not saying products don’t matter – they do. However, what makes more of a difference is the handling of the hair, and your drying technique.
      For instance, I never ever comb or brush my hair. The last time a comb touched my head was probably a month ago, that too in the shower with loads of conditioner in it. :haanji: And never disturb your curl pattern especially when your hair is drying.
      Also, use a leave-in product to help your curls retain their shape. That’s more or less all I do. My hair’s very low maintenance, thankfully! :yahoo:
      Also, my current conditioner is this one:
      And actually, the longer your hair is, the more weighed down it will be, which should make it more manageable 🙂
      And yay for this super-awesome blog!!! :yahoo: :yahoo: :yahoo:

      1. Hey Samantha,
        About the comb, yeah, the only time i run a comb through my hair is during a shower.
        I think my hair’s rebelling against the treatment it received for the first 15 years of my life (my granny would keep brushing my hair down, trying to straighten it so I wouldn’t look heathenish, lol)
        I’m terrified of leave in conditioners coz I’m worried I’ll mess up my natural curl pattern while applying the product on my hair. But I’ll begin using one immediately, thanks…
        And I will definitely check Enliven out. I hope it’s available here in Mumbai.

        Thanks so much again!!
        :thanks: :thanks: :thanks:
        I love your hair!! muaaah!!!
        K now my essay’s over. :toothygrin:

  2. very well written article samantha! i was reminded of the book “Dont Loose your mind loose your weight” with your style of that book and love your style of writing!
    you seriously have such gorgeous curls :love: what all products do you use to maintain them? ?:) my sis also has such curls and her hair is always so messed up 🙁

    1. Thank you, Parita! :)) I must get hold of that book sometime 🙂
      Take a look at my reply to CrimsonMoonlight. Hopefully something from it will help your sister’s hair :pigtail:

  3. This post is for me. Lol. I abuse my hair by tying it on top of my head all the time :(( will pampered them today only 😀
    Thanks Samantha… Huggs

  4. :woot: :woot: :thanks: :thanks: :thanks: soo much for this! I think I ought to bookmark it for future reference. :preen:
    And My Oh MY! How I envy your curls! :green: :green: They look sooo cute and fluffy. :dumb: I feel lke grabbing at them :teddy: I swear..I’m so getting my hair curled once I get into college. :waiting:

      1. 😐 😐 😐 I don’t know what to make of your laugh.
        And I’m totally joining the curly gang once I’m outa school. :waiting: I’ve always prioritised soft,fluffy curls over wavy princess locks. :preen: :preen:
        And I can tell…Your hair is practically a shove in that direction for someone who looks at it. :dumb:

  5. Hey samantha.. which shampoo do you use?? I’m a curly head too.. and i’m currently using john frieda.. its totally not worth it..just waiting for something better…

        1. Wash only with conditioner. But no silicone conditioners, or you need sulphates to remove buildup, and sulphates are drying. And the occasional baking soda and ACV rinse.
          There is much more to it; this is only the cream off the surface. The whole science behind it, the method etc. is a whole huge wad of material to type out now. I’ll try doing an article on my hair routine sometime soon. 🙂

  6. love love loved your post. :yes: I like it when ppl try to defy (in a good way ofcourse) the general rules that are set. I too agree that washing once in 3 days is a bad idea especially with the dust, sweat and all. if one uses a mild shampoo i am sure shampooing every day is not a bad thing at all. i also think a lot of ppl get swayed by the number of products that are out there and the fact that there are great reviews of those products. (I am guilty of the same :whistle: :whistle: ) so using too many products is kinda bad too i think..

    I loved your hair style. looks cute as hell.

    1. Thank you Aruna! 🙂
      If you find products that use good ingredients and help your hair, no harm in using them. Of course, too much of anything is bad :silly:

  7. AWESOME post!!! LOVE ur Samantha! And ur writing style is so cute n quirky :waytogo: :waytogo:
    I am a curly head too, but they have never looked *good* curly :(( I LOVE ur curls!!!
    Totally agree abt the flat ironing and tight ponytails part… Looking fwd to reading abt ur har routine :))

  8. Awesome post Samantha! I liked the convincing language you have used. :waytogo: :waytogo: :waytogo:
    i was curious about one thing, I heard frmo a few people that honey and vinegar act as a good rise for your hair after shampooing it. I am trying that since past 1 week instead of using my conditioner, but would that harm my hair in the long run. BTW I just read Sonakshi Sinha’s beauty secrets which says she applies oil daily and washes her hair daily. What do you think about this? :secret2:

    1. Honey and vinegar won’t harm your hair, but try switching the vinegar in favor of apple cider vinegar 🙂
      And I don’t know about oiling, since I don’t oil my hair. Sorry 🙂

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